Have you ever wished you had a list of what not to say to a newly married couple? I have, and if you are anything like me, you probably have found yourself more than once having to remove your foot from your mouth. I am pretty sure I have a little toe permanently lodged between the molars on the left side of my mouth! So in high – even if not realistic – hopes of not having to taste toe jam again, here are a few wedding land mines we can learn to avoid.
Do not ask who was or was not invited.
When planning a wedding, one of the hardest choices the bride and groom need to make is who gets invited and who doesn”t. Whether a certain person”s RSVP simply said they could not attend or they didn”t make the guest list cut, it is best not to ask why so-and-so isn”t at the wedding. Chances are that a lot of thought and care went into choosing the guest list, so don”t let your curiosity get the best of you.
Do not ever mention divorce statistics – EVER!
Couples need lots of encouragement that they will not be part of the divorce statistic, and today of all days no one should ever bring up divorce or anything related to marital separation. Regardless of your views on divorce, no one gets married thinking that they might not make it. The vows the newlywed couple have said to one another show genuine love and commitment – and they should. Congratulate the happy couple, give them well wishes, and keep the D-word out of any part of your conversation.
Do not ask when the babies will be coming.
Newlyweds rarely have babies on their minds right after they get married. Most brides and grooms want to settle into their new life a bit before having kids. Wedding planning alone is overwhelming enough, and with adjusting to marriage, a new home and a new life, many couples don”t want to even think about the pitter-patter of little feet yet. Besides, they have enough nudging from the Mother-In-Law, they don”t need it from you!
Do not ask about the cost of the wedding.
Money can be a sensitive subject for the bride and groom, and trust me, they probably spent more than they want to admit. Finances used to be something that was taboo to ask about, and even today, more often than not, it still is best not to ask about cost. If you are getting married yourself and want to know the price of something you are interested in, discreetly ask about the brand, company, or model of your desired object, then look it up on the internet. Or consider politely asking about the price when the couple has returned from their honeymoon. But money is not usually something the bride and groom want to think about on their special day. All planning and spending are put on hold for that day. Let them enjoy it.
Do not ask for favors.
Even if you are buddies with the groom or besties with the bride, this is not the day to say, “Oh, I have been meaning to ask you to…” When the couple gets home and settled in, you may feel free to ask for favors, help, advice, or whatever else you need, but not today.
While not a comprehensive list by any means, these tips will help you be the model wedding guest…and keep you from tasting toes!
